Sunday, March 21, 2010

Non-Poetry/Un-Static

i am writing this because i am suddenly craving for ennui. the kind of unsettling gut-wrench that comes with being completely wasted and having enough time and almost enough void to fill several parallel universes with. and then some. last night was the fifth in a row when i passed out fully dressed and woke up raccoon-eyed courtesy the kohl i've been too tired(disinterested) to wipe off. and then i question the need of slipping out and into something else, with some water in between that can't wash away, what i don't have to wash away, what i don't want to wash away and what i will not wash away. from the mind, the body, and that layer of fluid harmony that binds the two, once in an odd while... but the craving soon transforms into the one you wake up with after a night of having too vivid a dream. and then you see that reality finds itself misplaced in this splendidly skewed order of things. waking up from one dream into the next, halfway between the wistful and the endless, and a unfaltering disbelief in limits of any kind and sort.

pandora's box, or actuality down the rabbit hole... a spinning whorl of wants and haves and cans and coulds. no ifs, no maybes, no perhaps, and none of the gargantuan words that require too much space and way too much distance. sand, with no hourglass to hold it. lanes, with too many twists and not enough bends. night, and glowing wisps of smoke. and trains... waited for, and then not caught, with a heartbeat trapped in a second. or two.

10 comments:

Arzaletta said...

its not your fault.....

Sugar Magnolia said...

Sand with no hourglass - *stares in awe*

Sherry Wasandi said...

@Arzaletta: Yes. Keep doing that. Posting statements that lie COMPLETELY out of context, is ALSO a replacement for wit.

@Sugar Magnolia: :D *bows*

Anty said...

It helps sometimes, ennui. Peculiar little contraption really, with more emotions and weight in a small word like that than anybody could ever handle with ease.

Srishti said...

OMG!! Are you on drugs?? :O

Sherry Wasandi said...

@Anty: Couldn't have said it better. You've got it nailed.

@Srishti: Close. It's a four-letter word.

A positively fatal one. :)

notgogol said...

Bloghopped here. Very very eclectic pieces on the same space - from Dali to Bergman to China. Will drop by again.

JD said...

One of your more interesting reads of recent times.
"..and then you see that reality finds itself misplaced in this splendidly skewed order of things."

I hear you loud and clear :)

Kirra Serra said...

"waking up from one dream into the next, halfway between the wistful and the endless"
Definitely quoting this. May I? *puppy-dog eyes*

Sherry Wasandi said...

@notgogol: Glad you found something to interest you.

@JD: Loud and clear indeed!

@Kirra Serra: Go right ahead. Between the two of us, that's how I hope to get famous someday. *wink*